How to Reconnect When You Feel Disconnected

It is no surprise that Apple is the world’s most valuable company with a market cap of around $3.5 trillion. The market cap giant sold over 231 million iPhones and 75 million air pods in 2023 alone. We’ve never been more connected online. We are permanently plugged in to what is happening around the world and within our communities. So why do so many of us feel so disconnected?  

Society has become gripped by screens and driven by the dopamine hits that fuel us through notifications, updates, likes and the fear of missing out. Nature thrives around us while the birds and bees fly freely whilst we remain trapped on our phones. We overlook our environment as we remain rapt in the world of online.

When we walk around, sit down to work or hit the gym, we slip our headphones in and absorb ourselves in music, podcasts or simply dead silence.

Wearing head phones creates a subtle barrier around ourselves. This barrier becomes even more pronounced as we look down at our screens.

We become less aware of what’s happening around us and more concerned with what’s playing on our screens or in our ears. Our senses are distracted and distorted. Our eyes are strained from screens and our ears are stressed from constant sound.

The way to start feeling more connected isn’t necessarily found on your phone. Close your TikTok and start to pay attention to your environment. This involves breaking subtle patterns and habits that have developed over time.

  • How do I break a pattern?
    • Respond differently

Here is a list of ways you can challenge yourself to find connection whether it is to other people you interact with or to yourself:

  • Resist the urge to look down your phone in a still moment and become aware of what’s happening around you. Make a mental note of one thing you can taste, see, smell, hear and touch.
  • Look up from your phone and smile.
  • Get an old-school alarm so you don’t have to rely on your phone to be next to your bed in the morning.
  • Set a rule for how much phone free-time you need after waking up or going to bed.
  • Leave your headphones at home and take the initiative to engage with people at the store, gym or on your way to work.
  • Put your phone on focus mode more often.
  • Go for a lunch date and don’t check your phone.
  • Forget about social media on the weekend.
  • Develop a JOMO mindset. A joy of missing out.
  • Join a community – chat to people. Get curious about something.  
  • Compliment people when you start to notice things you hadn’t recognised before.
  • Do something new and find a mentor or coach.
  • Walk in nature.
  • Start any activity that makes you forget to check your phone.

We’re going up against a powerful algorithm that understands exactly what we like and how to keep us hooked to mindless scrolling. Be conscious. Start to recognise how powerful that draw to our phones is every time we feel slightly bored or idle.

Realise that the connection to ourselves and to the people in real life is more important than any like or update.

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